Hello.

Today’s post is not a review, but rather a blog version of outtakes and the like that never ended up getting a full review for one reason or another – in some cases, it was due to being massively underwhelmed, in others it was because I was busy at the time and just never got round to it. It’s also going to be quite short – in my head I thought that I would have absolutely loads, but it turns out there’s only seven or eight – and of those, some were time limited things (like the Christmas market ones), and some I’ll look to review properly in the future, so these won’t feature here.

So, without any further ado, here are some kebabs/kebab-related foodstuffs I shoved right up my face but never had the decency to tell you about it… until now!

“Wok Man”

This isn’t a kebab, is it?

From the St. Enoch Christmas Market in 2021 – I went along and it was the usual stuff, y’know? Exotic meats, Yorkshire Pudding kebabs, wooden toys, Welsh cheese, Bratwursts-in-a-bun, so I spend precisely 5 minutes wandering around, going “hmm. HMM! oh”, pretty much on repeat. Until I got to Wok Man. They were selling stir fries. This picture was the stir fry they done with doner kebab meat on it. It was actually really good – something that I’d happily eat again, I do like a bit of fusion cookety me. After all, if you can get kebab pizzas and kebab lemonade*, why not stir fry?

8/10

Reason for not reviewing at the time: My fingers stopped working.

“Cafe Paradise”

Now this was a joy!

What you can see there is a lamb seekh and baby chicken skewer, with salad and chips. This would have been a delight to the dietitians at Lewisham Hospital who, years ago, advised me to get in all the food groups. The only thing missing here is dairy, but don’t worry readers, I’d had a Petit Filous earlier, so we’re all good.

This was part of a work night out, and I had every intention of doing a post in it’s own right about this place – but it never happened. Covid knackered the lot. However! Cafe Paradise, more or less a West End institution, are still there, but they call themselves Saffron by Paradise now and I imagine the menu’s have changed to make them more Deliveroo friendly. They are, nonetheless, amazing, and are well deserving of your money, so feel free to give it to them.

9/10

Reason for not reviewing at the time: Initially laziness, then the whole pandemic thing.

“Grill Guru”

They say that a picture speaks a thousand words. In this instance, over 900 of them are inappropriate to use on a family friendly blog.

Which came as a massive shock – Grill Guru are, despite the above, a very good takeaway, and I think it’s fair to say that their expertise lies in other areas. For instance, their loaded fries (i.e. chips with stuff on them) are pretty legendary, and I’m told the Peri-Peri chicken was some of the best you could get in town. However, this is a kebab blog, and the fact remains that they did something weird to a pitta bread, put *that* on top of it, and served it to a paying customer. In their defense, this was from ages ago and they could conceivably have got better – but I’m not particularly in a rush to find out if they have.

4/10

Reason for not publishing at the time: Kebab-induced anxiety.

“Wagah Kebab House”

This wasn’t bad – slightly off the beaten track, Wagah is round the back of the St. Enoch Centre on Howard Street, near where Fury Murry’s was. This was basically dinner from when I worked nights – technically, Shawarma King were closer, however they went through a bit of a patch where their late night kebabs were pretty ropey, so I ended up going here one night instead.

I didn’t make any notes on this place as it wasn’t a planned visit – but from what I recall it was pretty good value and taste wise it reminded me of the much missed Cafe India kebab on nan (Gt Western Road – it’s now a Black Rooster Peri Peri, kids) – though it took ages. I might go back…

Wagah Kebab House, Howard Street

7/10

Reason for not publishing at the time: Had work to do!

“Turquoise”

Anyone of a certain age whose come back from town at 4am after a night of excess and frippery will be all too familiar with Turquoise – they open late, they sell food. Is it any good though? Well, yes and no. The meat’s pretty good, I guess, and like Istanbul on the south side, they sell Turkish style kebabs which is to be applauded.

That said, you pay for the convenience, and I suppose the price they pay for opening late in a fairly central city centre location is reflected in the price you pay for the food, and this was like seven quid or something. Plus: Pitta bread. Went soggy in under 30 seconds. Taste-wise it was ok, but overall, not a fan.

Turquoise – Oswald Street

5/10

Reason for not publishing at the time: Ghosts.

“Chilli Thrill”

I could be cruel and say that the overall score is hidden in the above picture, but I won’t.

Again, like Turquoise, it has it’s benefits – open late, provides food.

I’m struggling.

I don’t know what else to type.

Look at it.

LOOK AT IT.

No.

Chilli Thrill – High Street

4/10

*kebab lemonade’s not a real thing.