‘ello.

So an email pops in to my mailbox from Just Eat, the takeaway internet guys, offering sweet £££ off my next order, but here’s the thing – it was a lunchtime special. Having conquered the evening and weekend market, I guess it’s time someone took on Greggs, the Boots Meal Deal, and crisps. Flicking through the list of places I could redeem said code, I came across Al Sultan, a place that I’ve been meaning to review for ages but keep forgetting, due to withered brain.

So a race against time began. Al Sultan is a mile away from my flat, and I’d said I’d collect in 15 minutes. A tall order on foot, but I just about managed it without having to break into a light jog. Very efficient, sitting under the keep warm lamp by the time I’d got there, job done.

BUT WHAT DID I GET???

Dear reader, I got this:

(Should clarify – I got the Calzone. The Betron headphones I’ve had for ages, the empty bottle of vodka had nothing to do with me, and the bus stop is owned by the local authority)

Anyway, a Calzone! Calzone, which is Italian for “pizza sandwich”, isn’t a kebab – you know this, I know this – but like my trip to Pizza Punks t’other week, it’s on topic because the filling, in this instance, was lamb shawarma.

Now hold your horses. I know it doesn’t look like much, but don’t be too quick to judge. Wait till you see it from an alternate angle:

Well, ok, it doesn’t look like much here either. Maybe calzones aren’t photogenic. I have no idea how to make this look elegant. However – it doesn’t matter because it was really good: the meat was similar to that in Lazord, a bit sweet, chewy, and spicy – there was loads of it unlike in Pizza Punks, and it only cost me two quid. The thing that is now annoying me is that feeling I should have just got a regular wrap. Never mind.

Are there any downpoints to the Al Sultan lamb shawarma calzone? No, not really. The box was really big, which made the food look small in comparison, however I struggled to finish it (due to it being big, not due to it being rubbish.) I could be petty and deduct a point for the comically oversized container that Amazon would have been proud of, but that would make me a terrible person, and God knows there’s already too many of them kicking about at the minute.

Al Sultan

Lamb Shawarma Calzone, £6.50

10/10