Good evening squires/squiresses/squirrels. At time of writing, Jimmy Carr off of the telly has found himself in a lot of bother, and may find himself out of a job soon. Whilst that sucks for Jimmy Carr, it’s an opportunity for the rest of us, isn’t it? One person’s door closes, and another one opens for […]
Hello! I am on a train. As I look out of the window, I see a golf course, somewhere outside Barrhead, and I briefly wonder if I’ve picked the wrong hobby. I shouldn’t be on a train to the English/Scottish border, where I will have approximately three hours with which to check out the town, […]
Hello! A quick review today, by way of a request/tip-off – Doner Kebab Pringles are a thing. Well, I say Pringles – these were released to coincide with Euro 2020, which itself ended up arriving a year late, so here I am eating them and it’s nearly September. Pringoools! Geddit? It’s a joke. In keeping […]
HELLO! *waves manically* If you, like me, have often wondered what the BEST badly-named but rather tasty international foodstuff is, particularly from restaurants that occupy space at the corner of a row of shops, then this is the review for you. I have scoured the length* and breadth** of the country*** to find challengers for […]
Hello! My head’s stopped working. I’m not sure if this is what one would call “writer’s block”, and to call this “writing” is I suppose factually accurate, if not a particularly great example of the oeuvre. I’m not even sure that oeuvre is the right word to use? Is oeuvre even a word? Doesn’t it […]
Hello! Today, I went to Cathcart, Glasgow’s most scenic suburb. Don’t believe me? Think this is another shawarmapolice.com “silly” “joke”? Not at all. You’ve got Holmwood House, you’ve got the Snuff Mill Bridge. You’ve got the demolished Scottish Power head office where I had three job interviews in the last noughties, all knock backs, all […]
Evening! I’m gonna keep this one uncharacteristically brief, folks – for no other reason than I’m absolutely bank-holidayed out. Decided it was a nice day for a walk, and because I’m an idiot, I decided to embark upon a 10 mile walk in the 21° sun whilst wearing a jacket. In fairness, I have a […]
Well hello! It’s Good Friday! A day in history when Jesus was crucified, and Bob Hoskins had a very difficult day at the office. For many people in 2021, for those in work and not furloughed, it marks the beginning of a 4 day weekend, where in Scotland we can’t currently go anywhere. Good Friday […]
Hi! Shawarma Police reviews these days have been a bit like buses; you wait ages for one to turn up, and then it turns up. Used to be three but because of Covid, it’s just the one. And you’ve waited ages. Unlike buses, Shawarma Police won’t charge you £2.50 to go three stops down the […]
Wotcha! In the words of Bono, Geldof and Ure, (there may have been others) – “It’s Christmas time, there’s no need to be afraid”. WRONG. There are plenty of things to be afraid of at Christmas time. Here are a few that spring to mind: 1. Running out of Port. 2. Gas leaks. 3. “Christmas […]
Shawarma Police 